I often have students who fear a confrontation with a bigger opponent…they ask, ‘what is a bigger guy swings at me? How do I defend against the haymaker from some huge guy?’
Let’s look at communication first….
From the interwebs…’Dr. Albert Mehrabian, author of Silent Messages, conducted several studies on nonverbal communication. He found that 7% of any message is conveyed through words, 38% through certain vocal elements, and 55% through nonverbal elements (facial expressions, gestures, posture, etc).’
If we consider this, we are at a breakdown of how we should address most violent confrontations.
The 7% we use has to be very careful in what we hope to achieve. The 38% should be annunciations and emphasis on what we want them to understand in the 7%. The 55% should be preparation in case the 45% doesn’t work.
Now, let’s look at a few examples.
Many times people will tell us what they are going to do. This is gathering our intelligence. If they say, ‘I’m gonna beat your ass…’ You may respond, ‘Oh yea, what are you going to do, punch me?’ ‘You going to throw me around?’ ‘You gonna stab me or some shit?’
I have seen where someone will say, ‘I will beat your face in!’
Take the intelligence and combine it with their 55%. What is their stance, their posture, their hand placement? Are they positioned like a grappler, do they have a grappler build? Are you taller than them? Are you at a tackling distance for them? Or, are they holding their hands, clinching their fists? Are they postured like a boxer?
What is their 45% telling you? You can also use this to your advantage in your 45%.
The 45% may be telling them what we will do in order to set up something physically. ‘Keep talking and I’ll kick you in the BALLS.’ This may illicit a protective movement. ‘Don’t make me put you on the GROUND.’ That’s 7% vocal and 38% vocal element.
Your 55% should be hands up, nonaggressive but dealing with what we are given by the aggressor. This may include body blading, positioning to drive the fight to where you want the fight to go. If you are good in open space versus you may have a vehicle or table you can drive the fight to. You may have friends you want to position the person toward. Your 55% then becomes non-aggressive but strategic.
Now we get back to the concept of the Goal.
What is the goal?
If you are dealing with an aggressor who is much bigger, stronger, you may be injured in your right arm, etc. In this case, your 55% is to set up for an escape. Your 7% should reflect this with 38% on what you need to accomplish in element, ‘I DON’T want to fight. I’m SORRY. You’re RIGHT.’ ‘Let ME BUY YOU a drink.’
Then you may use your 55% to position toward the bar, toward security, toward escape. Conversely, if you are prepared for a combative action, you may push with your weak hand or feint with your weak hand, keeping it on their face…to set up your dominant hand for a strike should you need to.
We often think of fights as being uncontrollable or chaotic. They aren’t – if you use good training and scenario based training in the training room to create situations, see how they play out. You can begin to break down. When you teach your students the nature of communication you educate them that what they, how they say it, and what they physically do work in harmony.
Size matters little in communication once we get past the size or aggressive nature of an aggressor. Proper reading of communication, proper response in communication, combined with devastating offensive methods such as The Elbow can give us the edge we need regardless of the aggressor…then it comes back to the 80/20 rule we discuss in Defense Around Vehicles. If we succumb to the situation and do not keep goal orientation…we can lose quickly. But, if we keep our eyes on the proverbial prize…we can win.
I’ve been there…it works.
– Matt
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